Wednesday, 9 September 2015

How to Deal with Disappointment

Received your exam results and couldn't be more disappointed? Most of us have felt that way - whether you were 1 mark of an A* or had been told you were working at a B grade to then get a D.

In most cases you can't do anything about it other than to get your head around these things and I will give some help as to how you can deal with self disappointment even in situations separate from your exams.

1. Firstly, try and see what you did rather than what you achieved. I know that I tried so hard for my AS level exams that I gave up ALL of my interests and hobbies to do revision and work for my courses and I'm proud that I did that (even though I didn't like it).

If you know that you you did the best you could do then the outcome should not have your full attention. GCSE's and A levels are a process of 2 years of work and (personally) the exams at the end of the year do not show your full potential. Of course you could apply this theory to many things such as if you do exercise and you feel disappointed that you didn't do more - at least you did something.

2.Find out what you can do with the result. If you can still take the subjects you want , that's great but if you can't you could either take another subject (that you wouldn't mind learning) or let the people in charge know that you will be completely committed and will work your hardest. Whatever you do, do not feel defeated because you are worth more than an exam result.

Again, if you are having a hard time dieting then look at what you have learnt when you have tried to diet, for example if you know that you will binge eat if you are stood around in the kitchen or that having spare money will make you buy from that vending machine. Every day and every experience is another chance to learn no matter what the lesson may be.

3. Talk to someone. Even if they don't know how they can help you, just talking about whatever is bothering you will make you feel like you have released something that has been really annoying you. Sometimes you might not realise that it is something you need to talk about or it can allow you to figure things out for yourself. 

I know that there have been plenty of times that I have been so disappointed with something but then when I tell someone I realise that my mind is making it a much bigger deal that it is or that there is a simple solution that I hadn't realised before. You never know that the other person might also have some very important advise to give you anyway.

4. Think about it perspectively - will this exam result be relevant in a year? Or 5 years even? Sometimes it could be and you need to find a way to counter that so don't procrastinate and really reach for what you want. If it won't be then don't beat yourself up about it. My Dad got a U in his German A level and it obviously wasn't that important because he got on with the rest of his life and has a successful job.

5. As I had just said - don't beat yourself up about it. There is no point in getting getting upset then staying upset. Once you have been upset accept it and move on. It might sound harsh but moving on will help you to counter the set back and take your mind away from it. It will help the problem to become something bigger or to be left behind instead of staying forever as a disappointment.

I hope these few little point of how to deal with disappointment have been useful.
- Zin